22 September, 2017

Planting Bamboo



I'm working on constructing a privacy screen using fast-growing bamboo. Out of the various species rated for growing in pots (which provides relative mobility - since we don't own the property - and avoids the potential for out-of-control growth), we chose Phyllostachys Bissetii, for its cold hardiness (so it will survive and stay green through the winter), high tolerance (so there's less chance of us accidentally killing it), height (for quicker vertical growth), and, of course, price ($44-$64 per plant, depending on the size you order). I ordered the 3 gallon size plants, to save a year of waiting for them to grow up, and their tallest canes are already a good 10 feet tall (being as flexible as they are, they were doubled over in their shipping packages) - although they still need to fill out quite a bit.


For planting, we chose 26" round wooden barrels ($35 ea @ Home Depot) to give the plants plenty of room to grow into. Following Lewis Bamboo's instructions (when it comes to bamboo, they really know their shit), and assuming an approximately 20 gallon container (leaving some space at the top), for each plant we mixed 75% top soil (15 gallons or 2 cubic feet of Miracle Gro Moisture Control Potting Mix), 20% organic (4 gallons Black Kow Composted Manure, measured out in one of Homer's 5 gallon All-Purpose Buckets), and 5% Bio Char (about half of a 32 oz package of 18-5-12 Time Release bamboo fertilizer, sold by Lewis Bamboo).


I hope they like their new home, and survive their first winter. It will be exciting to see the new canes shoot up in the spring! Some species have been documented to grow nearly four feet in twenty four hours (but only during their spring growth phase). Although we're planning to cap the new growths at not much more than ten feet, in the hope that the plant will redistribute its energy to filling out instead of shooting up. I was concerned about covering that 6-10 foot gap above the fence in our yard sooner rather than later, but in hindsight, I might have chosen a shorter yet bushier species instead. Still, we'll see what happens as it grows.


Visit lewisbamboo.com to learn all sorts of fun facts about bamboo, or even get your own!

31 August, 2017

Dorm You Remember Me

When I look back on my college days, I have to remember that it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. I'm no stranger to the manipulative effects of nostalgia. I specifically remember standing in my dorm at one point, senior year, and thinking to myself, "I'm going to miss this. The bad parts will fade into obscurity, and the good parts are the ones my mind will keep coming back to. But there were bad parts. I had the worst depression of my life during these years. I'm still not completely over it. Yet, overall, I enjoyed it. I had fun."

And I still look back on those years fondly. For better and worse, I was on my own. For the most part. It may have been a bubble. But I could lead my own life. I decided when to get up, when and what to eat. It was my own responsibility to get to class. I alone would suffer if I didn't make it. It felt like having my destiny in my own hands, and that if things went wrong, it was my fault, and my fault only, and within my control to change. No parents shepherding me around.

And I was surrounded by peers. People who, generally speaking, were not poor. Were not dumb. They had dreams and aspirations, and they had the potential to achieve them. And I had friends. True friends. Although not many of them, but it only takes one or two. I had friends that came and went during my earlier school years. But it was different then. We were just kids. Hanging out at school. Occasionally at our parents' houses. In college, it was my life. My choices.

I suppose I could have that now, out in the real world, now that I'm an adult. But it's different. This world is different from a college campus. People working the daily grind, not expanding their consciousness on a daily basis. You don't have all your basic necessities huddled together within walking distance, in a pristine, groomed landscape. You have to drive around places. Through the urban decay. Among people who are not the cream of the crop, the best and the brightest. Among people who aren't making it very well in life. People who are sick, poor, dumb, and without passion.

And you've become one of them, just struggling to get by. Wasting your time and your talents searching for an opiate to dull the pain and the boredom - regardless of whether that's illicit drugs, or something less physically destructive, like absorbing yourself into a world of fantasy, under the guise of an alternate identity. The results may look different, but the reason is the same. And they both take you away from that ideal utopia that was drilled into your head by your parents as you were growing up. You're so smart. You're so attractive. You can accomplish anything, if you put your mind to it.

Well, I suppose two out of three ain't bad. Except nowadays it seems like being smart and attractive in a sick, sad world is just another form of torture exacted by a cruel and indifferent god. Well, maybe the smart part. Being attractive still and always has been a nice life hack to getting things you don't deserve. And maybe my principles are being dulled by the wisdom that comes from life experience, but I'm not bothered by that, because I favor pretty things myself. Maybe that makes me superficial, but there's nothing superficial about being happy, and if that's what makes you happy, well...then why the hell are you so sad?

28 August, 2017

The Pursuit

The one thing I just can't understand about life is that, within all of this misery - some of it self-inflicted, much of it not - when we find something good, something we like, something we enjoy, and that makes us happy, we always come up with reasons why we can't have it. We don't have enough money, there aren't enough resources to go around, our health won't permit it, it's not "appropriate", it's not compatible with what the other people in your life want or need...

Happiness is so hard to come by. When we happen upon it, why can't we let ourselves enjoy it? I mean, I know there's a balance to life. Even the very laws of physics impose certain restrictions, and human emotions are not logical. You have to work, you have to take care of your body, and your mind. You have to treat other people with respect, too. But beyond that, life is something we construct for ourselves. (I mean, this thing you call "society"? It's just a bunch of hairless apes playing house. Money is so important, and yet it only has as much meaning as we collectively agree to ascribe to it). And it's so short. And there are bad parts to it that we just can't avoid. So why can't we structure it so that we can at least capitalize on the good parts?

I honestly can't say whether the fact that I seem unable to live the life I truly want to lead is more because I'm trapped in the prison of my own mind, or if it's more the result of society imposing its laws and regulations (designed to subjugate the many for the benefit of the few). No doubt both forces are involved. Life is just a long series of compromises.

26 July, 2017

The Excesses of Advertising

Or "Shared Endorsements"

Maybe it's not so strange that this is the second post in a row on this blog on the subject of advertising (and I swear it has nothing to do with me watching Mad Men - as the internet has changed everything in this field), but it seems pretty ironic to me, because it's not something I concern myself with very much. Until lately, I guess.

You see, a lot of people complain about companies violating your privacy online. I've always maintained a fairly liberal approach to the sharing of information. Perhaps I've been naive - I mean, I know information of any kind can be abused, but I genuinely think these companies are just pursuing their commercial agenda - to increase profits. Not that that, by itself, is a good thing (I am anti-capitalist), or doesn't involve a lot of potential harmful side effects, just that it doesn't necessarily mean that they're maliciously trying to screw us over. And, frankly, I like getting targeted ads about things I've searched for and am interested in.

But I just got a Walmart ad on my Facebook page for something my roommate googled (anonymously, by the way) on her phone earlier in the day. And this might just be the last straw. See, I don't mind the internet sending me targeted ads based on my interests. What I don't want is it sending those ads that are meant for me, to somebody else. Even if it's because we used the same internet connection. People share internet connections all the time. It doesn't mean that I want what I do on the privacy of my own computer to be shared among the "household" (especially if that household includes the apartment across the hall, or everybody else leeching off of a communal wifi hotspot).

And, I mean, you can go through and turn off a bunch of settings on this or that service (provided you can figure out who the offender is - is it Walmart? Is it Facebook? Is it Google?). But how can you possibly know that you're not missing something? Besides, what I'm really concerned about is not the behavior on my screen, but the behavior on somebody else's screen, and I can't change their settings. I don't actually want to change how the company caters their service to me, I just want to make sure that information isn't leaking out somewhere it doesn't belong. In other words, I don't necessarily want to stop getting ads, I just want to stop my ads from being sent to other people. I tell you, I have half a mind to stop using Google altogether and instead choose a different, more obscure search engine with a better reputation for privacy and anonymity (hello, DuckDuckGo).

Look, I'm an open and honest guy. I'm also guarded - I don't open up to just anyone (my semi-anonymous internet life notwithstanding). But I view honesty and transparency as a virtue in and of itself. I'd love to live in a world where nobody has any secrets because nobody needs to have any secrets - because everybody accepts each other for who they are. But that's not the world we live in. I don't want my neighbors potentially knowing intimate details about my life - like, say, medical conditions I might have, or some of my more fringe sexual interests (especially in this backwater, conservative community) - because I searched for related items on Google or other sites.

I've always been of the opinion that I don't care if some faceless goon in a warehouse on the other side of the planet knows certain details about my life in order to better direct relevant ads to me as part of some impersonal, corporate strategy. But I don't want people I run into in my daily life - whether they're people I know, but haven't opened up to the point of telling my deepest, inner secrets to, or strangers who have no business knowing that much about me in the first place - having access to any of this private information. See, it's not my concern that these companies collect this information. That's natural. It's my concern who they give it to. And until now, I thought that only included shadowy government organizations, in cases that are probably more or less warranted (no, I don't trust the government, but I'm also a realist - I know they're not out to get me). But now, it's personal. Consider the camel's back broken.

P.S. I like the conveniences of the modern web, but this is beginning to get ridiculous. I posted an image to Facebook recently, and the site automatically attached my real name to my face. I didn't approve of this. I deleted the tag, of course, but that doesn't change the fact that some machine out there has the ability to identify pictures of me on sight - a machine that knows my real name, and god knows what else it may have gleaned from scanning my Facebook account (at the very least).

Although, again, I'm very open in my life - I don't broadcast, because not everyone wants to know (and this information isn't appropriate in all situations), but I wouldn't hide the fact that I like to pose for pornographic pictures from anyone if they asked me directly. I just don't want random strangers on the internet, who I might enjoy having an anonymous "acquaintanceship" with online, to necessarily have my real name, home address, and social security number without me volunteering that information (which I would normally only give to people I trust on a case by case basis).

I guess you could say I'm having mixed feelings about the personalization of the internet. There are definite advantages, but drawbacks too. I'd like to be able to trust that mankind will approach these changes with dignity and respect, but I know too much about human nature to convince myself of that delusion. At any rate, it's an interesting time to be alive. For better or worse.

P.P.S. At the intersection of targeted advertising and facial recognition, I was googling (oops, my mistake) facial recognition technology and I came across this chilling gem: "Microsoft has patented a billboard that identifies you as you walk by and serves ads personalized to your purchase history." Great, so, now when I'm walking down the street I can have the fact that I recently bought adult diapers (not really, but it's a plausible and embarrassing scenario) broadcast on a huge screen for everyone in the vicinity to see. Horrifying.

18 June, 2017

The Limits of Advertising

I got to meet a celebrity this past weekend, which was exciting. But what's sad is how easily I could have missed this rare opportunity, if not for pure happenstance. Consider this: I'm a horror fan. And not just a casual horror fan. The kind that has reviewed hundreds of horror films for a personal blog dedicated (mostly) to horror. Furthermore, I'm a dedicated fan of The Walking Dead (both TV and comic). And while it would be cool to meet, e.g., Andrew Lincoln, or Norman Reedus, or what have you, I'd cherish more the opportunity to meet an actor who plays one of my favorite, if less popular, characters. At the top of that list would be Madison Lintz - who played Sophia and featured in one of my favorite and most heartbreaking scenes from the early seasons of the show - whom I have, in fact, met - a few years ago. But next in line would be Addy Miller, who, despite only featuring in a single scene, is the sort who, you might say, makes an impression. She was the first walker any of us ever saw, in the show's beginning minutes, even before the opening credits rolled in the pilot episode (setting the unflinching mood of the series). She was the "teddy bear girl" in pajamas, shuffling around in her bunny slippers, that Rick meets at the gas station. You can buy Halloween costumes modeled after her.


For kids and adults!

What I'm saying, basically, is that I'm exactly the sort of person you'd want to target in any kind of marketing strategy for an event featuring a celebrity appearance by Addy Miller, as I would jump on that opportunity without hesitation (as demonstrated this weekend). Yet I found out about it purely by accident, on the off chance that I happened to be visiting the mall one week prior to the event, and saw the sign for it before it was too late. Can you imagine my disappointment if I had learned after the fact that, beyond my wildest dreams, Addy Miller had been right in my metaphorical backyard (and trust me, this is the middle of nowhere - nobody comes here), and I had missed out on meeting her?


I'm sure that the people running this event were hoping for a good turnout (participation yields profit, which also ensures that things like this can happen again in the future), and were trying to reach out to as many people as possible who might have been interested in coming. But it just goes to show the limitations of advertising, that a person like me - your ideal mark - could have so easily slipped through the cracks, if I hadn't happened to decide to visit the mall that day. (Otherwise, I would have been out of town on the day of the event). I'm guessing that the event coordinators were counting on random passersby in the mall to notice the sign and decide to drop by, because "why not, it might be fun!" Meanwhile, I'm the sort who'd be planning ahead and looking forward to it, and I might not have even known it was happening!

Is there a more efficient solution to the problem of targeting advertisements to the people who are most likely to respond to them? I don't know. Granted, I'm pretty socially isolated - I don't hear a lot of word of mouth buzz, and I'm not tied in to a lot of networking services, either; so maybe it's my own damn fault. Surely it would have helped if I'd been following the mall's Facebook page. But I don't care to check Facebook every day. And what about all the fluff I'd have to sift through? I mean, I could be following Addy Miller's schedule of appearances (if she has such a thing), but out of the, I don't know, hundreds of appearances she makes in any given time frame, how few would even be relevant to me? For all I know, there's only been the one hit in the last seven years since she was on the show!

Besides, how would I have even known that this was something I wanted to look for? Out of all the possible things I could be interested in, great and small? While it's an opportunity I wouldn't have missed, it's not something I was prepared to, for example, drive to the New York Comic Con for. I feel like you'd need some kind of a smart service that knows my interests and where I live, to cater to me personally. Which is kind of the way advertising is going these days, what with sites saving your browsing history and such. Like, the fact that I just spent an hour googling Addy Miller should clue my personalized ad-crawling bot in to the fact that I might be interested when she's scheduled to show up at a mall within a ten mile radius of where I live, that I visit semi-regularly. Ya know?

I know, doomsayers like to cite this as an example of how we're all being spied on for nefarious purposes; but while the possibility that this data could be abused is very real, I don't think most major corporations are necessarily doing it for those reasons, and there are potential advantages to be had. I mean, I'm not unconcerned that with the right motivation, the government could probably put a pretty damning profile together on just about anyone, based on a selective interpretation of their browsing habits. Given a choice, I'd rather have privacy than convenience (because no matter how closely a government agent scrutinizes your life under a microscope, he's not going to get the full, human picture). But it's worth looking at both sides of the coin. Naivety and malice are not equivalent, even if they do end up accomplishing the same objective sometimes.

Oh well, I guess I can just count this as an example of the happenstance in life, and how serendipitous it can be to find yourself in the right place at the right time.


Oh, and maybe how it's totally worth it to get out of the house sometimes, too. ^_^;

30 May, 2017

The Warm Thrill of Confusion

I hate politics. I wish they would just go away already. But we live in extremely politicized times, and it's becoming ever harder to stay silent. Which sucks, because most people are idiots, and should really just keep their damn mouths shut. But that's precisely why I think it's counterproductive for smart people to keep quiet and let the idiots dominate the conversation, even though I'd really just prefer not to get involved in this fools' game. I honestly can't decide whether it'd be better to step aside and watch Homo sapiens destroy itself, or make a futile gesture to insinuate myself into their nihilistic pursuits. But as an alien who has been stranded on this planet, with no way of getting home or even contacting my kind, my fate is inextricably linked with the fate of these overly self-important apes. And so what other choice do I have? Even if, in the long run, it changes nothing.


As much as I try very hard to avoid the news (as the new Yardbirds sang, "please don't tell me 'bout the news"), I just can't seem to escape it (thank you, Facebook - which, like some stereotypical Thanksgiving dinner, can't decide whether to be a forum for friends and family to keep up to date on their lives, or a place for everyone to vent their political frustrations and practice armchair activism). And so, Entertainment Weekly (which I browse casually for updates on TV/movies that might interest me - but only because my roommate subscribes to it) reports on the recent Ariana Grande tragedy. It's terrible that there is senseless suffering in the world - I get that - but I'm concerned with how we react to it. And I've been concerned at our approach to terrorism since at least the aftermath of 9/11, which happened over 15 years ago already. Allow me to juxtapose two short passages from the article as an effective demonstration of the point I wish to make:

"One music-industry veteran tells EW that...'the zone of security [eventually] ends. It's outside the venue where it gets tricky. If this happened in New York City, you don't get patted down going into the subway.'"

"One music-industry source tells EW, 'With security, it depends on the show and where you're going. Sometimes you get wanded and sometimes you don't. I would certainly hope that would change. Everybody needs to think about security measures going forward.'"

So, let me get this straight. An attack happens outside of security checkpoints, and our response is to make those security checkpoints even stricter? When it's clear that this specific action would not have prevented or even lessened the severity of this attack? At the very least, I'd think that the fact that these attacks keep happening (the article itself lists three other serious attacks that have occured just in the past few years), might prove that the countermeasures we've elected aren't having much of an effect. Who is responsible for re-evaluating the efficacy of these social control programs? Years ago I linked a paper on so-called "Black Swan Criminology" - the theory that shit happens, and that it's tragic, but reactionary policies (enacted with fanfare while emotions are still running high) are often only effective at assuaging people's fears - unfortunately by restricting their liberties - while not actually accomplishing anything to prevent these crimes from happening in the future. We have separation of church and state (if we at most only pay lip service to it); we should have separation of social policy and emotion, too.

Here's my reactionary diatribe:

The police state and terrorism have a symbiotic relationship. An authoritarian government loves a successful terrorist act, because it gives them an excuse (that no one will question, at the risk of seeming unsympathetic) to enact more Draconian measures to further control its citizens' lives, while not actually making the execution of terrorist acts any more difficult (because that would be counterproductive). Meanwhile, the public goes along with this, mumbling the Orwellian chorus of "not letting the terrorists win" while simultaneously contributing to the terrorists' goal of whittling away at our freedoms, because they're too stupid to know the difference. But it's not their faults, because they've been trained by an education system (that runs suspiciously like a prison) adopted from a totalitarian regime, to memorize and recite back anything their instructors tell them, while suppressing independence and critical thought.

I realize this makes me sound like a conspiracy theorist, but it doesn't mean the government and the terrorists are working together (necessarily) - it just means that they have similar aims. And if your government has similar aims as terrorists and that doesn't horrify you, then you need to go sit in the corner and think long and hard about that for a while.

16 May, 2017

More Guild Wars Girlies

This is something of an ode to a post I made way back in 2008, when I first started playing Guild Wars for the first time (nine years ago!). I've always taken pride in my characters, even (or especially?) though they're all basically representations of me as a female, in the skimpiest armor available to each profession. Nevertheless, I also take some pride in their names and the equipment they wield. So I'd like to catalog them here for posterity (and just plain fun).

2008 Characters

Three of the four original characters I created from my first stint on Guild Wars were represented in my original post (the fourth must have been created just after I wrote that post).

Kazekirino Flora (Elementalist)

Kazekirino Flora was the first character I ever created. Out of all the professions available (six, originally), Elementalist was the most appealing to me because I've always enjoyed offensive spellcasters. Elementalists are basically the Black Mages of Guild Wars. She's the only character of mine named after a previously existing fictional character - from the manga/anime series Claymore. The first part of her name is Japanese for "Windcutter". Fire is the most popular element for Elementalists (nuking!), but I switched to an Air build (lots of armor-ignoring lightning spells and interrupts) to do justice to her name. I even finally got a sword that works functionally like a staff! It's pretty badass, too.

Salix Sepulcralis (Ranger)

When it came time to decide on my second character, I looked at all the armors for all the different professions, and picked out my favorite one (Elite Druid), and made a character of the corresponding profession. I named her Salix Sepulcralis, which is Latin for Weeping Willow - my favorite type of tree. She's an archer (weapon of choice: Feathered Longbow), and these days she keeps an Iguana as her preferred pet. I used her bow techniques a lot (some of which have inspired one of my characters' skills in my RPG) to do a lot of pulling/aggro control and interrupts, which gave me a slight advantage in those early days before I had heroes to pad out my team. I haven't done much trapping, but I tried out a Touch Ranger build once to get through an annoying primary quest in Eye of the North. It's a very effective build, but I enjoy using a bow, so I usually stick with the classic Splinter Barrage build for satisfying AoE damage.

Malady Grimm (Necromancer)

Here is Malady Grimm, my Necromancer in her Elite Scar Pattern armor, hanging out in the Underworld (the fact that I can even hold my own in the underworld, albeit with a crack team of heroes, shows how far I've advanced). Necromancer is actually the one profession with the most styles of armor I actually like, so even though this is one of the skimpiest armors in the game, I often switch it out with several others (I like Krytan, Profane, and Elite Cabal) for variety. I'm probably "wasting" my Necromancer by using a life steal-based Blood Magic build, but it's worked for me. I never could get the hang of using Spiteful Spirit, and Minion Masters (while a fun novelty) are better left to heroes. Call me simple, but the game is just more fun when I'm dealing direct damage to enemies (the more the better!) - which is probably why one of the only professions I still haven't tried is Mesmer, although I'm starting to regret that now. But that brings me to my next character:

Filia Spatheros (Warrior)

I'm surprised it took me so long (relatively speaking) to make a Warrior, because I like her Elite Gladiator armor almost as much as the Ranger's Elite Druid armor. Plus, I love swords. I love swords so much, I tried to have my Elementalist wield a sword, and I even started collecting evil-looking blades for my Necromancer! Which is why my warrior is named Filia Spatheros, which is a (probably muddy) amalgamation of various Greek words roughly translating to "lover of swords". Filia is a nominalized version of the suffix -philia, and Spatheros combines spatha (sword) with eros (the root for erotic). Does that mean this character has a sexual attraction to swords? Yes. Yes it does. Lol. Check her out wielding her Deldrimor Sword and Shield. Pretty badass. For a long time she was my most satisfying character to play, dealing out heavy damage against enemies, especially after I capped the Hundred Blades elite skill for AoE damage (AoE - however you reach it - is the holy grail in this game for me). Later expansions seem to have rendered the Warrior more or less obsolete, however (see: Assassins and Dervishes).

2013 Characters

I don't remember all the ins and outs of when I started and stopped playing Guild Wars over the years (except for the period preceding this latest resurgence, when I pretty clearly put Guild Wars aside to make time for RPG Maker), but Guild Wars is an easy game to slip into, so it's entirely possible that I played it on and off a lot through the years. I don't remember the circumstances, but at some point I bought the Factions and Nightfall expansions, to add brand new continents and campaigns to explore. It must have been in 2013, because that's when my next two characters were born, one for each of the two new expansions.

Kunoichi Nanashi (Assassin)

I mentioned this briefly in my last post, but when I fired up Factions (an Asian-flavored campaign, involving a deadly plague afflicting a sprawling urban jungle), I had to choose between a dual-wielding Assassin and an ambiguous, spirit-summoning Ritualist. I chose the Assassin, which sounded more interesting to me, and had the better armor choices (you can see the Imperial armor - my favorite - in the picture above). Although, Factions probably has the best original professions - because spirit spammers and dagger spammers alike are highly effective - so I couldn't go wrong with either one. I named my Assassin Kunoichi Nanashi ("nameless female ninja"), and gave her sais. It's funny, when I watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a kid, Raphael was always the lamest one because his weapons were so unimpressive. But then I watched Ronin Warriors (a.k.a. Yoroiden Samurai Troopers), and I fell in love with Lady Kayura's weapons - which are sai-like, though extended to the point of basically being swords. I've been looking into having my Assassin dual-wield katanas as an alternative, however.

Sandra Lumina (Paragon)

The other full-size expansion is called Nightfall, and it takes place in the desert, with a Middle Eastern/African vibe. The story involves an ancient demon god who is in the process of being resurrected, so as to plunge the world into darkness. Since you're fighting on the side of light, and you're surrounded by sand, I named my character Sandra Lumina. She's a Paragon, which is essentially a paladin or white knight who wields throwing spears, and specializes in using shouts and chants to support the team. I picked this profession solely because it had the better armor choices (Dervishes, like Ritualists, are plagued with unattractively long and bulky skirts), even though, as it turns out, Paragons have very limited effectiveness. Their only meta build is the "Imbagon", a highly defensive build, which just isn't that much fun for me to play. Which is a shame, because strictly from a visual standpoint, this is one of my favorite characters. She's got highlights of gold in her armor, accented by the shimmering shield I picked out for her.

I actually have a funny story about that. I was looking up shields online, to pick out the one I wanted for my Paragon, and I decided on the Diamond Aegis. But this is a rare shield, that would require a lot of work and/or luck to acquire (since I'm not, at this time, in the habit of buying/trading with other players - besides, the Guild Wars economy runs on ectos, or Globs of Ectoplasm, and I barely have any, since I've done very little elite dungeons/endgame content). So in the meantime, I settled on the more common Aureate Aegis, colored gold. Then, believe it or not, while I was playing on my latest character (since I'm doing more Hard Mode content than ever before), I actually stumbled across a Diamond Aegis! But, when I tried it out on my Paragon, I decided that I actually liked the gold shield better. At least I hadn't gone out of my way to get that Diamond Aegis... Oh, by the way, the spear she's wielding is a Spiraling Spear, which I like because it reminds me of the Lance of Longinus (sort of - it's single-tipped) from Evangelion.

2016 Characters

Fantazma Gloria (Ritualist)

So when I came back to Guild Wars last year, I still had two empty character slots unused, but four professions left to try - two from the original Prophecies campaign, and one each from Factions and Nightfall. And for the first time, I was ready to pick a profession for practical considerations, and not superficial ones. I heard that Ritualists were pretty powerful, with their ability to summon armies of spirits to their aid. I was not disappointed, as much of the content in the game became much easier than it had been in the past. (Although, to be fair, I'd also at this point learned how to look up killer builds for my heroes, and put together whole team setups for optimized performance - 7 Hero Player Support for the win!). I named my Ritualist Fantazma Gloria - an obvious play on the word "phantasmagoria" referring to her ability to bind spirits to her will.

Sylvia Divinora (Monk)

I chose a Monk for my last slot, largely because I wanted to try out the 55 farming build (although now I'm hearing that it's not as effective as it used to be). I'd avoided playing a Monk in the past, despite this profession having armor comparable to the Necromancer's Scar Pattern armor (in the picture above, you can see the Dragon armor, dyed green), because the idea of healing a party doesn't interest me as much as dishing out damage to enemies (also, it turns out that heroes generally do a better job of healing). But I've been playing with a smiting build, based on the Ray of Judgment elite which deals AoE damage, and it's actually been lots of fun. I named the character Sylvia Divinora, a slight modification of Salvia divinorum - not because I actually have any interest in the psychoactive plant, but because I wanted a holy-sounding name, and I really liked the sound of this one, as well as the fact that it evokes a sense of "divine salvation". I remember thinking up the name while watching the Rio Olympics last summer - I swear, I almost called her Christa Redentor! I have her wearing a halo, and am working towards earning her the coveted title God Walking Amongst Mere Mortals. It's a lot of work, but I got off to a good start by earning Legendary Defender of Ascalon for my first time ever!

Beyond

I'd love to complete my collection of professions by making a Mesmer and a Dervish, except that doing so would require $20 for the two extra character slots (up to this point, I've been using only the ones that come with the game and its expansions), and, perhaps more importantly, it would mean a lot more hours to sink into this game, and I'm at a point where I need to think about taking a break. If the server stays online well into the future, though, maybe someday I will!