NFTease

I'm humble enough to admit that I don't understand NFTs - neither how they work nor even what they are (consider the part in the video about "deliberate obfuscation" - 8:36-9:12). But I'm open-minded enough to have given them the benefit of the doubt, while networking with artists on Twitter. And I'm future-minded enough to buy (although not literally) into the promise of change, because the system we've got right now - it's not working.

But I'm also not dumb, and I can tell you that NFTs have never passed my own personal sniff test, and they're not something I ever felt compelled to mess with. I also just watched the Wolf of Wall Street, so the idea that people can make millions of dollars scamming the gullible and the diseased (i.e., suffering from gambling addiction) by selling the IDEA of something that is in fact worthless - well, that's real.

It's also a poetic irony that the artists I was networking with on Twitter sold this shimmering idea of an artist's retreat where creatives would meet and collaborate, and it seemed like it could be the first time I'd ever have any real world contact with another human being involved in the controversial niche I've dedicated my life to - nude photography. So much so, that I canceled my summer vacation plans (this was two summers ago) to leave my schedule open, and then in the weeks leading up to the trip, the retreat evaporated into thin air with barely a mention. At that point, the community organically dissolved. The artists are still out there, but the camaraderie I thought we had simply vanished.

I think it's valuable to cultivate the ability to consider both sides of any issue (and if there are any issues I sound one-sided on, then you need to think long and hard about why that is). I get why people WANT to believe in NFTs. Aside from the "get rich quick" scheme which is never anything more than a scam, I heard a lot of talk about decentralization, and taking power out of the hands of the establishment. But seduction is a form of manipulation. It doesn't mean the ideals are flawed. But you have to be careful that you're not being strung along - and for who's benefit? Not your own.

So I also feel gratified listening to what sounds like a competent takedown of the whole phenomenon. I'm hesitant to sign onto anything that could be labeled close-minded or regressive. But what can you say about a concept that literally nobody is able to explain in a way that's simple and makes intuitive sense? It's almost humorous - if it weren't so alarming - how common the mantra "I don't really understand NFTs, I just want to get in on the ground floor" was among the artists I interacted with.

For better or worse, when I don't really understand something, I try to keep an open mind, but I'll take a step back and lurk more. Do my research. Maybe that approach isn't really better - I'm fairly risk-averse, and I will never be successful because in order to reach the top you have to take a leap of faith that will lead nine out of ten people into the gutter. But caution and rational examination of a situation - these are useful skills, too. They could even save your life someday.

Chains and Things

I'm not superstitious as you know, but in a lifetime, your mind is bound to wander. I'd just as soon curse God for the handicap I was born with, than view it as if it serves some greater purpose. The important point there is that it's a matter of perspective. Whether I'd be happier believing in a divine purpose isn't evidence for God, it's just psychology. And what if I simply don't have enough of an impaired conscience for that kind of self-deception? Do I then deserve to suffer?

Even if there WERE a God and hardship served a valuable purpose, more good could be accomplished in a two-way relationship with this all-powerful being, instead of one-way devotion to a negligent and absentee guardian, whose divine bounty depends on the uncharacteristically petty demand for blind faith without acknowledgement.

I don't pray, and I don't go to church, but if you don't think I've spent most of my life aching for a God-like being (that doesn't exist - because I would know if He did) to guide me and console me, then you're being offensively ignorant of my circumstances (but no surprise there). It's not *really* God I have a quarrel with, because God is just a fictional character invented by man. It's the men who follow God that I truly can't stand.

Anyway, that was a bit of a digression. I've considered many times whether my handicap is an obstacle I was meant to overcome - one that's supposed to make me stronger, or perhaps more sensitive - or if it's a kind of restraint holding me back from going on a rampage through this life. I often wonder what I might have accomplished if my situation had been different.

Maybe it's egotistical to think things would be significantly different. Maybe I'd just be a little bit happier, living a normal life, raising a family, working a decent job. But I am ambitious. I'm not ruthless, but I'm not lazy, either. I want. When Kramer asks George, "do you ever yearn?" - that's me. I just wish I wasn't held back by forces that - and I hate to admit this, but it is demonstrably true - are even stronger than the limitless reach of my desires. What's the point? Why was I born into these psychic chains?

But in reality, there is no meaning. No purpose. Other than what we invent for ourselves. The universe doesn't care if we live or die. All that we have and ever will accomplish will one day be dust in the wind. And a few millenia after that there won't even be dust or wind because the planet will be gone. All life will be gone. There may be other life at some point. In the vast expanse of time and space, there might even be separate sources of life that meet.

Or there might not. Regardless, nothing is eternal. The only thing that matters is the here and now - which, in a cosmic sense, extends beyond any one person's lifetime. There's no sense in squandering the limited resources we have, and accelerating ourselves toward our inevitable end. Our existence may be a tiny blip on the scale of time, but it's all we have.

The universe is a harsh and apathetic arena. Pain is inescapable. We should bless the fact that we are able to experience joy and pleasure - and we should not overextend ourselves to create further suffering over that fact. The void of space doesn't care which dog eats which dog, because all dogs will be consumed by it in the end. Why should we not, then, strive to create a puppy paradise in the interim?

If killing you would make me happier, and I had the power to do it, who's to say what would happen? The disadvantaged stand intrinsically upon higher moral ground, simply because they have not been exposed to the corrupting influence of power. We would all like to believe that we'd have the restraint to put the One Ring down, but I think it's better for our conscience if none of us were ever confronted by that choice.

Democracy is ideologically equivalent to socialism. There is no such thing as equality so long as power imbalances persist. The only good ruler is the one who doesn't want the crown - and such a ruler would hand the crown off at the first chance, likely to one of the many clamoring to wield the power it represents. I think about all of these things when I think about my chains. But it doesn't get me any closer to a resolution.

Demonization

Fire Dance

I saw this image posted online and immediately fell in love with it. In fact, I'm thinking about getting a reprint to hang on the wall right next to my print of Soulacroix's Spring. It's a lovely painting, evocative of a classical witches' sabbath - women dancing nude around a fire out in the woods as the devil looks on. It has a darkly festive atmosphere, and the glowing, orange flames almost seem to jump off the page/screen/canvas.

Nymphs Dancing to Pan's Flute

But then I found an apparently alternate version of this painting, and the difference is night and day. Black and oranges are replaced by greens and yellows, and you'll notice the "devil" loses his horns and gains a flute. Credited to Joseph Tomanek - a Czech-Republic immigrant painting in Chicago in the early to mid-20th century - the first version is usually called "Fire Dance" by print sellers, but official gallery listings cite the title as "Nymphs Dancing to Pan's Flute" (circa the 1920s, as near as I can figure), which is more indicative of the mood of the second version.

Was the original something in between?

I can't find any information on the origins of the different versions. Were they all painted by the same artist, or did somebody else come along and creatively change the mood? Which version was the original? Was it something in between the two extremes? I'm not even sure I know which version I like best. But the transformation from mythological nymphs to mischievous witches is a perfect representation of the manner in which Christianity has historically demonized pagan religions.

Thus, free spirits celebrating the rapture of nature become evil agents in league with the devil. The Green Man is bathed in flame and recast as Satan. Women celebrating their freedom (and their bodies) are viewed as deviant sinners. What was intended to be festive merriment is conceived as sinister plotting.

Hell (and its attendant minions) was invented by Christianity to inflict suffering on the masses, and take away any joy that was sourced from outside the church, all in the service of steering them, through deception, to stand under the commanding authority of the cross, and serve as soldiers in a war that was never really about good and evil; it's just another iteration of us and them.

Is this not truly despicable? I'm not attacking Christianity out of malice - this is self-defense. I'm the person dancing naked in the woods. I'm out there, revelling in the ecstasy of existence, harming no one. Yet it's Christ's followers who have labelled me a menace to society, and who lead the hunt to isolate and eradicate my kind, forcing us into hiding, unable to honor our own spiritual beliefs. Believe me when I say this is personal.

You think I want to be sitting here at my computer ranting? I'd rather be organizing a nude art hike, and contributing to the rich tapestry of human culture and society. But beyond the fact that I'd struggle to find interested members - because most people would find the notion bizarre - I can't even float the idea without it giving people - even people who currently like me - doubts about the purity of my intentions, as well as ammunition to use against me. Because they've all been primed by cultural indoctrination in a country that was famously founded by Puritans.